Fantasy

My senses came alive as the aroma fill the room or booth in my case. Yep, I've been fantasizing about fries. Not any fries. The fries from banquet. The big fat lean features of the fries. *drools. I was lying on the bed in my aunt's room when kak ati came barging in and fantasize abt this particular fries. Hmm.. We're mad girls fantasizing about fries in bed.

Chances

I've been thinking. A lot of the workshops that I attended willingly or not has one thing in common. It remind us that we're not ready to face life. The recent camp however surprised me. Most of the workshops are about trusting, falling, standing up again, expressing and embracing. It is true that we have to embrace every moment. But I realised that most of us, are being difficult when it is time for us to embrace something bad. During one of the workshops too I realised how abandoned our Student Council is. Pretty bad I must say. Anyhow, I did enjoy the camp. Very, very, very much. Although I was super tired because I started packing at 4am. 6 hours before I have to leave home. Then, when everything is settled. Folded clothes are already ZipLocked I put it nicely in my backpack when I noticed a piece of white cloth in that backpack. I was startled knowing that it is use to cover the tombstone. Yes, yes I am talking about BATU NISAN's white cloth. I quickly zipped the bag and delay my packing til the next morning. I wasn't frighten I was so shocked. And it reminds me of my grandfather and brother and the bad experience that I personally experienced during one of my visits to the cemetery. It was so fresh in my memory that I had to quickly put the bag away. Tsk! Scaredy cat.

matter of time

Sometimes I wonder what fate means. This never ending quest about why I did what I did. And the consequences of what I did. Some maybe unbearable some, are. Everything comes with a package. It's the matter of accepting the events of life. But being me, human that is, I often forget that everything happens for a reason. I find fault in everyone for every ugly event that happened. Then I realised there's noone to blame for whatever that took place. If I was to blame someone shouldn't I blame god for whatever happens? Because he let it happen? That isn't very fair is it? Blaming the one who gave me life to live. The least I could do is appreciate the strength that he gave me to face the downside of life. I don't have control over my life.

Sometimes we're too busy determining our tomorrow that we forgot about today. Maybe I should just let fate take control of my life and follow the flow. Afterall, life is life and fate is a part of life. Whatever will be, will be. I think I'll just have to accept it. Maybe. Amend my mistakes and continue my journey. Someone once said that there's no formula to happiness except the acceptance of what life has thrown to you. Maybe I should experiment this quote or maybe not.

get over it, seriously.

I'm pissed. I failed my biology and chemistry. Well, there's a first to everything. Am so freaking pissed because I actually studied both subject. Sat down for hours. Which is a rare sight of me. And yet, I failed both subjects. Friday is a heartbreaking and frustrating day.

I hate my current situation. I hate it so much. There's nothing much I can do, but to get through with it and get it over with.

~Sorry eh Lya I dragged you to Chai Chee.

Taggy Thingy

RULE #1 People who have been tagged must copy this survey on their blog and may replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.
RULE #2 Tag 5 people to do this survey and those who have been tagged cant refuse to do it. These people must states who they were tagged byand cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by continue this game by sending it to other people.

1. Do you have secrets ?
- Yep. Everyone has one, don't they?

2. Would you fall in love with a guy younger than you ?
- err.. Klau dah jodoh.. ok pe?? Haha! But no. I prefer not to.

3. Do you enjoy going to school ?
- Yeah! *Most of the time

4. What would you do with a billion dollars ?
- Backpacking. Paris, Milan, Germany, Brazil, Africa. And probably donate some.*ceh step baik jap =D

5. Will you fall in love with your bestfriend ?
- No. NEVER!

6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone ?
- Both. =)

7. List out 7 favourite things that you like.
- NETBALL, silat, sneakers, sastera melayu, guitar, ice-cream, Frappe.

8. If you have one wish, what would it be ?
- Right now, reverse time.

9. Is there anything that has made you extremely happy ?
- Yeah!

10. What's the memorable thing anyone have done for you ?
- My surprise Birthday Party 2 years ago.. =)

11. How would you see yourself in 10 years time ?
- A better person of course!

12. Who is currently the most important people to you ?
- Family, and I mean the entire family. Classmates. And Closety.. =)

13. What is being regreted as the most important thing in your life?
- So far mcm blum ade gitu.. hmm..

14. Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor ?
- erk.... dunnoe??

15. What is your favourite colour ?
- Greeeeen! Hidup Hijau!!

16. If you fall in love with two people similtaneously, and both of them do the same, who would you pick ?
- Alamak... Erm... The buddy-type.. the less mushy but romantic at the same time?? I dunnoe..

17. Would you forgive and forget no matter how horrible a thing the someone has done ?
- InsyaAllah

18. What do you want to tell the someone you like ?
- Err, "Hi excuse me, I THINK I like you, ok bye"

19. 5 people you've tagged.
- Z, Juana, Fadhilah, Afifah, Kin

O to the V to the E to the R

Woooo Huuu! No sleepless nights anymore no miserable throbbing back pain!! *cheers* I can finally relax and watch tv and plug in my lonely earpiece which I abandoned for 3 weeks. Occasionally I plugged it in. Too tempting. But only for a song, or a few songs. And I slept for a maximum of 3 hours every night.. Tsk! Exam sure does has its own way of torturing people.

I wanna do a "say NO to exam!!!" campaign But do we have a choice? And who would fund my campaign anyway?

It's not about the late night, last minute revision. It's the result that scares me. I am 100% sure that I won't be smiling from ear to ear. U know, like the kids in SunKist advertisement, the one with oranges covering their teeth? Yeah, i won't be smiling like that. Or worst! I'll be crying like an old lady whose husband died.

Now that exam is over, I miss the early morning study meet ups at McDonald's! ='(

So much is happening lately. I've finally decided to let go. I'll feel empty. But it's better than crushing me..

please..

Exam is a wreck so far. Sleepless night resulting to sleeping in the exam room. Which obviously, is a stupid thing to do.. Then, I forgot everything that I memorised the night before. If I weren't too nervous or too lazy to study earlier I could have score those papers. Never mind, what's done is done.

This week has been hell sey! Hafal menghafal je kerja aku.. Naik biol otakku! Then, McDonald's daily study meet. I am starting to put on weight since I literally eat McDonald's everyday! Gotta burn some fats after exam.. Grr! I hate running. Pfft! Nevermind, silat is starting soon.. Wooo huuu! Missing the silat~rians already..

Talking about silat, happy birthday Khair!